5 years ago, September l I started playing guitar. (This also means that the 5 year anniversary of me breaking a guitar is coming up on October l, but that’s a different story) It is weird to think that I have been doing anything, on a nearly daily basis for 5 years.
I mean obviously, there are certain things I have done every day for the majority of my life. But like, I don’t consider brushing my teeth or wearing socks to a facet of my personality.
It’s crazy to think that a class I signed up for, the last minute, as a backup elective has become such a big part of my life. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. And I mean that in good and bad ways.
This journey has pushed me. It has shown me how to get pushed down and get back up again. It has forced me to find my voice and play out. It has shown me that no matter how many times you explain yourself to others, there still will be people who won’t understand. That is what it is, but you have to know when to walk away from situations where you don’t feel appreciated. This journey has helped me figure out who I am, what I stand for, and what I will and will not tolerate.
Through this journey, I have found my happy place. I have found a safe space. I have a community. I have discovered that sometimes home isn’t a place or a person, but stillness and six strings. Everyone has their forms of self-care and relaxation and mine just happens to be filling the silence with sounds.
It is intense to think about how entirely different my life is today compared to 5 years ago. How different I am. How different the world is.
If I could go back in time and tell myself anything, I’d go back to September l, 2015. I would stop myself, just as I opened the classroom door. I would look that girl, the girl I was, the girl that was me, in the eyes. And I would simply say “Everything is about to start slowly changing, including you, savor it.” And then I would walk away.
Here’s to the past five years, and what ever the next five may hold !
